Never be caught flat-footed at a dinner party again. Here are some iron-clad clichés about various countries in Asia that, when said with a knowing look and a certain gravitas, are bound to get you thoughtful nods from other dinner guests. At least, we think so.

 

Food for thought: Take your pick with an assortment of dinner-party cliches throughout Asia to pluck at and rifle through

Illustration: Debby Ng

 

Malaysia

• Malaysia is not Truly Asia
• Kuala Lumpur has fantastic architecture with Moorish influences
• Pulau Perhentian is Asia’s best-kept secret

 

Thailand

• Thai food is second only to Chinese cuisine in its sublime blend of spices
• Brothels standing side by side with temples – that’s the paradox of Bangkok
• Some of those go-go girls actually enjoy what they’re doing

 

Singapore

• Singapore is the Switzerland of the East
• The Singapore Sling is undrinkable
• Did you know – Singapore has a World Toilet Organization?

 

China

• China has the worst toilets in Asia
• Counterfeit-goods factories standing side by side with designer-goods factories – that’s the paradox of Shenzhen
• You must visit the Great Wall before you die

 

Japan

• Tokyo is hideously expensive
• Japan has the best toilets in Asia
• You must stay in a ryokan before you die

 

South Korea

• Everyone in South Korea has had plastic surgery
• Korean food is Asia’s best-kept secret

 

Laos

• Laos is Asia’s best-kept secret

 

Hong Kong

• Financiers standing side by side with fengshui experts – that’s the paradox of Hong Kong

 

Macau

• Macau is the Monaco of the East

 

India

• India is the largest democracy on earth
• Extreme beauty standing side by side with extreme poverty – that’s the paradox of India
• Indian water is undrinkable

 

Mongolia

• There are no toilets in Mongolia

 

Indonesia

• Indonesia is the world’s most populous Muslim nation
• Bali has managed to retain its authenticity despite the onslaught of tourism
• But Kuta is a hellhole
• You must visit Borobudur/ Sulawesi before you die

 

The Philippines

• The Philippines is the only Catholic nation in Southeast Asia
• The Philippines is the Italy of the East

 

Australia

• Australia is the West of the East

 

Vietnam

• Hanoi is so much more charming than Ho Chi Minh City
• Hoi An is so much more charming than Hanoi
• You must visit Halong Bay before you die

 

Bhutan

• You must visit Bhutan before you die

 

 

Do you have any helpful clichés to add to this list? Send us your comments below.